Ah, the last week of December. The time of the year for reflection and gratitude. Principally because I am fortunate to have the entire week off. The perks of working in higher education: the time between Christmas Eve and New Year’s Day is automatic vacation. No PTO is involved at all. Shoutout to all the tech bros who have this perk as well. Granted, I don’t get paid nearly as well as you folks do. But then again, I don’t want your work hours and stress levels either. Quarterly performance reviews - what are those?
This week of reprieve from work is an absolute privilege. I try to not take it for granted, though thankfully I don’t have to go very far. A visit to the local mall is enough reminder that for a lot of people, this “dead week” for me is some of the busiest times for them. Going to Costco on the week before Christmas is a complete disaster of congestion. Salute to the hard-working folks in the service industry. I am grateful I do not have to do your job for a living.
The rest of us should quit complaining: tip these people well and often.
Comparison can be the thief of joy, but I think it can also be humbling and motivating. Amongst my friends I make the least amount of money. I can either be jealous and sad about it, or use it as motivation to earn more money for myself. In reality I am neither of those. What’s there to complain about when so many people don’t have what I’ve got: a job that pays well, with great benefits (pension, baby!), and superb work-life balance.
Keeping this perspective actually provides me with great passion for what I do. Information Technology support may not be my first choice (or second, or third) for a career, but here I am nonetheless. It’s way more useful to be excited about the job than lethargy, or the “quiet quitting” thing that’s seemingly the rage in the news (read: putting in the minimally required effort). I have a choice, right? It’s better to choose enthusiasm and positivity. The work is more interesting that way, and the work days go by quickly.
To say I am passionate about my job may be overselling it, but I genuinely believe I am moving the needle in some way. A working laptop for a faculty allows them to teach: is that not what this whole education enterprise is all about? I can and absolutely do take pride in that. I greatly appreciate the gifts of chocolate from faculty members this time of the year, a small token of their thanks. That’s enough motivation for me.
However, there’s about 10 percent of me that wonders: what’s next? Is there something more, different, or better? I guess I am more Type A than I realized. A weird thing during this final week of the year off is an often sense of uneasiness. This is a week for recharging, and doing relatively nothing (except for writing the many thousands words of this, of course). Yet the urge for productivity is difficult to pause. I feel like I should be doing something other than sitting on this couch, on my fifth hour of YouTube watching.
What makes it more weird is that I was so excited for this week off before it arrived! Now that the week is here and I’m in the middle of it, I find myself asking an existential, “Now what?” It’s a sort of emptiness similar to the time I bought the Porsche 911 GT3. I’d just purchased my absolute dream car, and all that’s left afterwards was a tremendous sense of emptiness. It seems I am happier(?) being on the hamster wheel than being off it. But I already have my dream car - there’s nothing more after that? There’s no proverbial wheel to get back on.
You got/achieved the thing you’ve always wanted. Or the thing you’re massively looking forward to has arrived.
“Now what?”
It’s a crushingly existential question. 2023 is done. 2024 is soon to arrive. Now what?
You certainly won’t find me starting a new gym membership on January 1st (the unofficial national join a gym day). That’s because I’ve been exercising regularly since my early twenties. Granted, I’ve slacked off greatly since the beginning of the pandemic. Even though I’ve since lost the ‘COVID 15’ increase, my fitness level was not on par with what it was back in my late twenties. I was content with this situation, until something I did in 2023.
I took improv classes.
You’d be right in thinking: there’s no direct link between improvisation and physical fitness. The only thing remotely physically demanding about improv class is all the standing around. The inspiration to maximize my fitness was spurred on by the location where the classes are held: Fort Mason Center for the Arts, in the heart of the Marina District.
On every weekly visit to the Marina Green, my sights were inundated with people working out. Even on a Tuesday evening, when it’s typically dinner time, folks are getting a run in after a (presumably) long day at work. Meanwhile, I am sat on a bench at the park eating a plate of fried chicken and French fries from the nearby Safeway. The contrast cannot be starker. My once-a-week workout program suddenly felt shamefully inadequate. Maybe it’s that easy: place gyms next to fast food places. People gorging on unholy food items would feel embarrassed if there’s people working out in their direct line of sight.
Honestly, it’s seeing all the hotties in yoga pants that was the motivation. There are so many of them around Fort Mason. You think Chloe Ting is popular because her workouts on YouTube actually works? Even if it did, Chloe Ting would do way better view numbers than Chris Ting. The power of skin-tight leggings that accentuates the female booty is limitless. For me, I feel like I have to be at my physical best (at least endeavor to, anyways) in order to measure up. That’s the standard.
(Ladies, it’s super easy to attract a dude: be fit, wear yoga pants, and keep long hair tied up in a single pony tail. Magic.)
So towards the second half of 2023, I returned to a three days per week workout schedule of my twenties. Two of them heavy (relative, mind you) lifting days, and the other one a day for running. I think it’s important to have a mix of resistance and cardio training. The goal isn’t to look good naked (though that’s a welcomed positive effect); the goal is to be functionally sound for as long as possible into the aging process. If I want to be 80 years old and still be able to pick up 30-pound grandkids (a deadlift, essentially), then I’d better be able to lift multiples pounds more than that here in my mid 30s. Walk around the neighborhood unassisted in my 80s? I’d better be able to run many consecutive miles now.
The turn towards more exercising was also spurred on by the revelation that my blood glucose A1C levels have crept into the pre-diabetic level (5.7). That number is a bit inexplicable because I am generally quite healthy. My diet is decent, I workout enough (a number above zero), and I get decent amounts of sleep. How the heck am I in danger of diabetes? Nevertheless, numbers don’t lie. A1C levels are an aggregate of the last three months, so it’s not a fluke. My lifestyle had to change. High A1C is correlated to increase chance of all-cause mortality.
In addition to working out more, I’ve cut off unnecessary carbs. No more large bowl of rice for dinner in the evening. Anything with added sugar is entirely verboten. I’ve hugely increased protein intake, in concordance with the weightlifting (one gram of protein per one pound of body weight (per day)). My sleep schedule turned to utter precision: eight and a half hours of in-bed time for eight hours of sleep. Same bed and wake time every day, especially Sunday. And no electronics of any kind in bed.
I expect my A1C levels to lower into normal figures in 2024.
Proper sleep and consistent exercise are such magical elixirs towards our overall health, more so than anything pharmaceutical can provide (for now). Best of all, it’s completely free. What’s sad is people would rather have medicine solve the problem. Because it’s an easy shortcut. It’s also free, provided you are gainfully employed with provided health insurance. (America!)
Folks want shortcuts because they want immediate results. More people would exercise if one session of training loses 30 pounds of fat (rather than one year of training). You tell them it will take at least a year of consistent training, then they don’t want it. In a world of endless dopamine drip that social media provides (looking at you, TikTok), we’re simply not conditioned for long-term thinking and delayed gratification. The marshmallow test has become the Kobayashi Maru.
As I get older, the only way I want to think is long term. Time horizon in years and decades. Anything that’s worthwhile takes quite a bit of time (losing weight, for example). The day-to-day will get boring as habits for the long-term don’t change. (Another Sunday, another five-mile run.) Heck, even year-to-year may get boring. In 2023 I read lots of books, studied Korean every day, and wrote on this website. I’ve been doing these three things on a daily and yearly basis since 2015. (I’m not changing any of that up for 2024 either.) If you’re constantly seeking novelty in your day-to-day and month-to-month, then you’re guided by dopamine.
Two people who really could use a medicinal shortcut substitute for sleep: my housemates slash landlords slash good friends. In 2023, they had babies. That’s right: plural. Due to circumstances completely beyond their control, the fertilized egg split into two, and out came twin boys. A life achievement ticked. The friend groups are supremely happy for the two new parents. Though with twins, they are definitely playing the parenthood game on hard mode. To put it slightly off-putting: it’s kind of like one of the twin is a wanted pregnancy, and the other twin is an unwanted pregnancy. One baby at a time is difficult enough already.
The big change for me vis a vis the new bundles of joy (because it’s all about me) is that for the first time, I have someone occupying the space above my room. Goodbye to two and a half years of peace and quiet. Yes, the babies cry often, every single day. But, their cries - and accompanying noise when their parents are in the room - have become ambient noise. That’s the new normal, and it has not negatively affect how I live. I’m not the one waking up in the middle of night (the power of a white noise machine) tending to fussy babies.
Before the babies arrived in September, there was some mutual apprehension. I was worried that I would get kicked out of the house (because they needed the room or whatever), and my friend were worried I would leave the house (because the extra baby and baby-related noise would be too distracting). Obviously, both worries canceled each other out. I am still renting this studio-sized space from my friends, and I have zero intentions of moving out any time soon. The ability to walk to work is way too precious.
It’ll be interesting and fun to see the twin boys grow up right before my very eyes in the coming years.
Circling back to improv classes. It was not something I wanted to do. My standardized plate of (let’s call them) hobbies - reading, writing, Korean studying, photography - keeps me busy and fulfilled enough. The reason I signed up for improv classes is because of my best bud. A goal of his is to perform improv on stage, and the foundational lessons are the first of many steps. The dream is his. Because I am the world’s most supportive friend ever (slight exaggeration), I signed up alongside.
Three six-week classes in, I can say doing improv is one of the best things I’ve done this year (even if I don’t count how it tangentially got me to increase exercising). While I have no desire to perform on stage, the skills of improv is hugely applicable to every day life. The main thing is authenticity: you absolutely have to be yourself, and actually let the rest of the world see it. In improv there is no time to consider what other people think. Whatever comes to mind first, that’s the answer. It may indeed sound and look ridiculous, but it’s authentically you.
Improv definitely countered my tendencies toward self-preservation and worrying about what others think. Getting to practice saying and doing exactly what I am feeling - in that moment - chipped away at these ingrained habits. The point isn’t to be rude, but rather be unreserved in expressing what you think and being who you are. I can disagree with a friend without being an asshole. In the before times, I would just not say anything, because I would worry the friend might get mad at my disagreement.
The other big thing from improv is that it’s okay to be boring. A trip-wire in my social skills is the latent worry of being uninteresting, or running out of things to say. In improv, you can and must make interesting from boring. Being too concerned with coming up with something funny or fantastic will lead to locking up. The student ends up pausing with nothing to say in the middle of a scene. The trick is to notice something mundane, say it, then roll with it. The simple act of making coffee can sprout into something interesting.
In my everyday conversation with people, if there’s a lull in the conversation, I would pick something from immediate observation. It can indeed be the weather, or that street sign is crooked. Another thing I can do is say whatever that pops into my head (true improvisation), with zero care for applicability or fascination. It’s really about offering up something to the other person, and seeing if they want to respond to it. Often times the mention of something ordinary can trigger them into a story or anecdote. When that happens, I only have to listen.
Taking specialized classes as an adult. Check.
Another thing checked off the life experience list this year is getting bitten by a dog. It was friendly fire, no less. At the beginning of the year, a friend decided to adopt from the local SPCA. Rescuing a pet and providing it with a loving home is a deed of the highest order. It is especially so for my friend, because the pit-bull she adopted apparently had a horrific previous life. Due to tremendous maltreatment, the dog fiercely resource-guards, to the point of attacking other dogs and humans. If a dog enters his territory in an unfriendly way, he will defend with his teeth. Come between him and a piece of food, and he will literally bite you in the face.
Thankfully, I did not get bitten in the face. Instead it was my right arm. The dog was eating something, and I got a bit too close for his liking. Compounding my misery is that I should have known better: we were three months into training out his resource-guarding tendencies (all worthwhile things take time, remember). By then I was already familiar with his triggers. One slight moment of carelessness and boom, bite mark scars on my arm for the rest of my life.
My friend - the parent - was even less lucky: bitten twice. I greatly admire her tenacity and determination in rescuing this dog. We make decisions and commitments in life, and the honorable thing would to be see them through to the end, especially when the going gets really rough. No shortcuts, no rewinds. It would be all too easy for my friend to return the dog to the SPCA (where it will get put down for sure) after the second biting incident. But she stuck with it, paid for the many expensive lessons with a trainer, and practiced often when it’s just her and the dog. Those early months were arduous, even for me, an outsider looking in who was only there for some of the time.
The experience increased my appreciation and love for animals. Cruelty towards animals is the lowest of low, and absolutely cannot be tolerated. Show me any feel-good video about pets (reuniting with their long lost parent, for example) and I can easily bawl my eyes out. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 was a surprisingly tough watch.
It’s fair to say that 2023 is the first year when the COVID 19 pandemic is officially over. China dropping all pretense of control back in December of 2022 was the final buzzer. No more restrictions, no more counting cases and deaths. Masking has become a personal choice. From observation, after three years of heavy masking, we were all too ready to stop. I was happy to do so because the mask material was causing heavy acne breakouts on the face.
What has lingered on from the pandemic is inflation, especially when it comes to food. The standard wage increase we got at work back in 2022 entirely disappeared into the inflated cost of living. The constant theme in 2023 is being surprised at how expensive things have gotten (or remain). You can’t buy a meal these days (for one person) for less than $10. At restaurants of the sit down and get served variety, prepare at least $20. Korean food - a favorite cuisine of mine - is touching $30.
This year I’ve definitely cut back on eating out, at least in choosing the “cheaper” options, if not frequency. A $13 burrito bowl (with extra guacamole) at Chipotle remains a championship choice.
I hope I am not the only person who cannot get used to these sort of prices. I swear the rest of you guys seem to be inelastic to prices. Economics 101: there’s no incentive to lower prices if customer demand never falters. It cannot be normal for hotel prices to start at $200 per night even at the most middling of chains and locations. This customer is highly price elastic, which is why I didn’t travel anywhere in 2023. I cannot stomach paying the inflated airfare and hotel costs. These high prices won’t come back down until there’s more of me out there.
But if people cut back on spending, the economy would immediately go to shit, wouldn’t it? Advertisements to get people to buy things: that’s the whole house of cards.
Obviously, I do gladly spend money on things I am passionate about. At relatively great expense, I bought a new camera this year. In 2024 I have to start paying for maintenance on the BMW M2 (thankfully the insurance on the car has not gone up with everything else). I will never cease buying books to read, though I try to buy used whenever possible (unless it’s the same price new or used). Got to spend it on something, right? Otherwise, what is the point of working so hard.
Follow my passions: that’s what I want to focus on in 2024. The few important things to take up my time and resources. The COVID pandemic haze is over: time to get on with life. The destination is the journey.
I wish you all the best of health in the coming year.
Top 10 Songs of 2023
1. NewJeans - Ditto
2. NewJeans - OMG
3. Red Velvet - Chill Kill
4. NewJeans - New Jeans
5. IVE - Baddie
6. LE SSERAFIM - Eve, Psyche & The Bluebeard’s wife
7. aespa - Spicy
8. Taeyeon - To. X
9. LE SSERAFIM - Unforgiven
10. ITZY - None of My Business