Alternative title: I'm still waiting for that bacon in an In n Out burger.
It is Easter Sunday today and coincidently the first of April, so the appropriate joke here is Jesus rose from the grave and was like "Surprise! Not dead! April fools!"
As I've aged into my 30s I've grown to dislike April Fools day because honestly I'm easily suckered and tend to take things on their face value. I still cannot get over whichever media outlet it was few years ago that claimed In n Out burger was introducing bacon. For my money - which I would've gladly handed over to In n Out for a bacon cheeseburger - it remains the cruelest April Fools joke of all time. Donald Trump can resign from the presidency today and it still wouldn't top it.
Now that I think about it Trump really should've fake quit today to play us the fool: can't be any worst that all the other crap that's happened thus far during his presidency. An opportunity lost for good humor.
April Fools Day isn't entirely horrible: to avoid all the fakery and false hope, today's a good day for me to step off the Internet for a bit and enjoy the more tangible things in life. The wide web will still be there come tomorrow and we can go back to our regularly scheduled programming.
Hope your day is marvelous, and not too upset at the thing(s) that you wished were true.