Blog

Short blog posts, journal entries, and random thoughts. Topics include a mix of personal and the world at large.

Two more months of dry

It is official: I have two more months of Accutane treatment remaining. A blinding light at the end a very dry tunnel. I cannot wait to stop applying lip balm every two hours, and regain the ability to comfortably go outside when it’s sunny. Trading seven long months of monk life for acne-free skin for (hopefully) the rest of life is a fantastic deal.

It was two months ago - month three of Accutane when I largely stopped getting new acne. After that momentous occasion, it’s just a matter of getting enough overall dosage. They use my body weight to calculate, and that’s how we determined there’s 60 more days of medication to go. My understanding is insufficient dosage can lead to relapsing.

I actually don’t mind the lengthy medication period. I am essentially getting pure cocaine-grade retinol, which is fantastic for skin rejuvenation. Those over-the-counter retinol creams might as well be snake oil when compared to isotretinoin. If the side-effects weren’t so severe (and they really warn you against getting/causing pregnant), and the fact you need a prescription, I’d probably take low dose Accutane for the rest of life.

But, normal life must go on. Soon as I am off the drug, I shall add running back to my exercise regiment (I run outside, obviously). My cardio endurance has definitely deteriorated during this Accutane period. I’d run out of breath doing heavy squats before my leg muscles give out. That’s not ideal: you always want the muscle being worked on to be the limiting factor.

Here’s to a swift next two months.

Appointment in Samarra

I have a coworker who doesn’t like the drinking water coming out of a taps on campus. Not even the bottle filling stations where there’s a filter. His explanation is that he ultimately cannot trust the water that are in the (he supposes) old pipes. What does he do to sustain life? The coworker buys bottled water from the campus Peet’s Coffee.

I guess he does not know about the dangers of microplastics. Conventional wisdom is that we should avoid plastics as much as possible when it comes to things that can enter our body. Food and drink containers, specifically. Haven't we stopped leaving the plastic wraps in when we microwave our food?

Sadly, it looks like my coworker is avoiding a (potentially non-existent) harm by embracing another harm. An Appointment in Samarra situation, without the dying.

For a company as successful and beloved as Costco, why is their website and app situation so pitiful? It’s a complete chore to get it to show me whether an item is in stock at a local warehouse. And even if it does show to be in stock, it is not a guarantee to be true. Last week I was looking to buy some fish oil that was on sale, and the two stores I went to that showed to have it on the Costco website, did not. What a royal waste of time that was.

I get it: with all those delicious membership fees that Costco is charging us, what incentive is there to improve online shopping? I’m not sure they feel the need to chase those sales. Besides, the in-warehouse experience is where they can feed us samples to entice us to impulse buy. How many times have we gone to Costco with a list, but came back with twice as many items?

That's my secret

I’ll be honest, it was not a great week for my mental health. And it’s not because of what happened on election night. I think if who the President of the United States is has material affect on how you feel, then it’s time to shift your perspective on life.

What wrecked my mental health this week was my ongoing cycle with the Accutane acne medication. One of the not too common side-effects of the drug is moodiness, a tendency towards quick to angry. I guess I should go buy a lottery ticket, because that uncommon side-effect found me.

In the movie Avengers, Bruce Banner replied with an iconic line when asked to get angry: “That’s my secret Cap’; I’m always angry.” That best explains how I felt this week. Good news is the short temper did not manifest itself to actual adverse action (good thing I don’t have a car commute). Though it’s equally not great that the anger is bottled up inside. I’d be watching a YouTube video, and suddenly felt the urge to throw something at the TV.

Again, it’s good that there were zero execution to those negative thoughts. I definitely do not want to spend the money to replace my LG OLED.

Exacerbating the issue are some small hiccups at work that really is no big deal when you detach from it. But in my ill-tempered condition, those tiny problems became lumbering boulders on my psyche. It can’t be helped: there’s always going to be problems at work. Being on Accutane is only temporary. It’s not like I haven’t been warned that it’s going to suck for the duration.

Better days ahead.

It's cozy season

Perhaps it’s my inability to go outside talking - I am on Accutane medication, and therefore hugely sensitive to the sun, but the autumn and winter months are truly the best. Short days, long nights, and cold weather. Since I am avoiding the outside as much as possible, the cozy feelings of this time of the year makes it less confining to be stuck indoors. Seasonal loneliness? That cannot be me!

As we head into the month of November, I am reminded that the year 2024 is almost over. Doesn’t feel like it for me, honestly. I’ve been sort of in a time lock ever since I started Accutane about two months ago. The infamous symptoms of the medication are so overwhelmingly constant that you kind of endure it until it’s over. It feels as if I cannot move forward with life until this cycle is done. I’ve not felt 100 percent since I started the medication.

I helped my aunt and uncle moved home last weekend, and it was extra tough due to being on Accutane. I was chugging water every so often because I knew that if I didn’t, I would probably collapse due to dehydration. The drug drys me out so damn much. Add on physical exertion and being outside for a time? It was a struggle for sure.

Three more months of Accutane - I can do this. The battle with acne for twenty years must end in my victory.

Save the elbows

I recently added a barbell back squat to my weightlifting routine, and I couldn’t figure out why the inside of my elbows were sore afterwards. Kind of doesn’t make sense for parts of the arm to sore for what is a lower body exercise, right?

At first the soreness only occurred after a session, so I figured it was simply delayed onset muscle soreness. Those typically go away with enough squatting sessions in the log book. Well, wrong. During today’s workout, the inner elbows started to hurt during my warmup set. The general rule of thumb is: if something hurts during the exercise, then it needs to be addressed immediately.

Intuitively, I moved my grip on the bar further outwards. Because if the elbows are hurting during the squat movement, then it’s got to be the position that I am putting them in. And what do you know: it absolutely worked. Zero elbow pain on my working sets simply by widening my grip. I guess how well(?) our limbs can contort is highly individualized.

I’m just glad I don’t have to give up the barbell squat movement entirely. Like I had to do for the upright row, because it was hurting my shoulder. Once you get past a certain weight point, it’s difficult to progressively overload the lower body using dumbbells. Holding a 100 pounder to perform a goblet squat is not feasible, because my grip would give out way before my leg muscles do.

Chicken and Accutane

The rotisserie chicken at Costco remains one of the best food deals on the planet. Six dollars for two pounds of cooked chicken meat. Weightlifters looking to gain mass on the cheap should move next to Costco just for easy access. Have a hot dog and soda while you are at it, too.

It is somewhat bothersome that the chicken is put into a plastic bag. A piping hot roast straight out of the oven and into something entirely plastic. I’m no evangelist against polyurethane, but that cannot be completely healthy, right? I’ve stopped heating up food in the microwave with any sort of plastic container or wrapping a long time ago, and so should you.

Costco should use a paper bag alternative, or a compostable container. Raise the retail price slightly if you have to. I’d gladly pay for more for zero heated plastic.

Two months into the Accutane treatment for my chronic acne, and a new side-effect has materialized. Accutane causing intense dryness for the entire body is well-known and par for the course. I’d thought that meant my skin would become dry and cracked like on a cold winter’s day. I was wrong: my dry skin is showing up in the form of tackiness, a mild stickiness to the epidermis. Crossing my legs would cause the thighs to adhere to each other like velcro.

The skin is also fragile, too. Not just towards sun exposure, but impacts. Small abrasions that usually wouldn’t amount to anything can now wound the skin. I am definitely not going on mountainous hikes wearing shorts during this Accutane cycle.

It's not for me

Have any of the presidential candidates said anything about ending Daylight Saving Time? Whoever promises to abolish the abomination gets my vote. My expertly calibrated sleeping schedule does not wish to be arbitrarily interrupted twice a year. Recalibration always takes a week, if not more.

I am enjoying the autumnal flavor of early dark evenings. In combination with the lower temperature, it makes for a cozy atmosphere at the home. Don’t you dare string out the Christmas lights already, though. Have some respect: absolutely nothing Christmas-related until after Thanksgiving.

Human anatomy differs from person to person. Certain exercises is fine for some, but may cause pain for others. For example: I am Asian, so I’ve zeros issues with squatting deeply (Asian squat joke). Ankle mobility is just fine over here. Some are not so lucky in dexterity, so their knees might bark loudly in anger in every attempt.

The exercise I’ve encountered thus far that creates pain for me is the upright row. After I increased the weight to 50 pounds, my right shoulder cannot take the load. Afterwards, anytime I raised my arm above shoulder height, pain shoots from the shoulder joint. I thought not raising the weight above my chest would alleviate the issue, but no. Upright row is simply not in my exercise repertoire moving forward. At least it’s not a big three compound movement!

Perhaps it’s unavoidable, given a long enough timeline (and actual progression in weight), that I will eventually injure something while lifting these damn weights. I’m trying to avoid it, obviously. Primarily by not adding on weight that quickly. Apparently, even if the muscles are ready for more load, the tendons and connective tissues might not be. It’s safer to progress slowly.