Blog

Short blog posts, journal entries, and random thoughts. Topics include a mix of personal and the world at large. 

Be generous

With the coronavirus still raging on - even though we are at the endgame now with the vaccine rollout - there were to be no Super Bowl party this year. We simply cannot take the risk. Getting COVID now would be like getting shot after the war has been declared over. Just need to hang on until we each get our date with the vaccine needle.

So I was fully content with watching the big game alone, until my housemate said our neighbor is having a party. He - the neighbor - pulled the TV from his bedroom, placed it on a stand in his driveway, and circled it with various folding camping chairs. Since it’s not wise to have an indoor party, our neighbor brought it outside. Turns out I watched the Super Bowl with a crowd of people after all. It was a good time.

What struck me most was the sheer generosity of the neighbor. Along with the television setup, he had the barbecue going with various meats, and coolers full of beer and soda. All this out-of-pocket money just to serve others, to give them a good time. I have to say, enjoying this generosity humbled me to do better myself. To be kind, and help make the lives of others better and happier.

This same neighbor let us borrowed his absurdly tall ladder to string up our own Christmas lights last December. That is someone you are glad to have to live by you. A person you can count on in case of emergencies.

I endeavor very much to be that type of person as well.

Nice.

Got by with a little help

Followers of this blog would know: I recently moved.

And I could not have done it with my good friends. I don’t have many of them, but the few friends I do have I consider equally as dear as my family. The successful move out of my parents’ house reminded me just how awesome it is to have help from others.

Admittedly, I am a bit of a lone ranger when it comes to things: I prefer to go at it myself. It’s not like I see asking for help as a sign of weakness, it’s just that I’ve always had this mentality that in asking for assistance, I am being a huge bother to people. This is going to sound like I am blaming my mother: she’s the type of person who doesn’t like to owe anyone anything, and is quick to return a favor. She treats relationship with others as somewhat transactional, and some of that no doubt rubbed off on me.

So I was genuinely surprised and a bit taken-back when, without prompting, my friends offers their services to help me move. Things I would have done myself, like renting a van to haul my mattress, was taken care of voluntarily by my friends. In the case of the mattress, one of them had a Tesla Model S with a big enough boot to swallow the entire thing whole. Another friend - who happens to be the home owner I am renting from - saved me a trip to IKEA and got the bed-frame and bookshelves I needed. Yet another friend pitched in to ferry items from one house to the other, and assisted with building said bed-frame and bookshelves.

My stoic exterior belies how immensely moved I was by their gesture. My friend literally cut the time needed to complete the move by magnitudes. We started at 9 AM in the morning, and by noon the major move and build was complete, leaving me the afternoon to unpack and get my things into place.

If they are reading this: you guys are awesome! Thank you so much, with all sincerity.

Walking with the sunset.

Please be kind

Though I try to remain positive, times are indeed chaotic right now, and many people are going through much difficulty. Even those lucky to not be ensnared by the grasp of the coronavirus may be facing intense economic hardship. or are at their wit’s end with concerning about their children’s education prospects in the immediate future. We’re all trying to be as normal as possible during these decidedly abnormal times, and I think it’s important to keep in mind that it’s possible to have a bad day, and to offer grace to those who may not momentarily live up to our perceive standards of social decency.

We have to keep kindness; for ourselves, and others.

Is there really any use being angry at someone else because things aren’t going your way? Perhaps the line into Trader Joe’s a just a bit too long, and you’re incensed that you have to wait for half an hour in the beating sun before you’re let in; what purpose would taking out your frustration on the line usher serve? An usher who cannot change the situation, and who is probably simply happy that he’s still got a job right now. We can’t treat our everyday situation as normal until things have completely gone back to normal, even if the facade says otherwise.

On the flip side, as a pseudo service person myself (IT support), I have to also be mindful the angry customer may be going through some issues, and them being unreasonable at this moment is a not a reflection of who they are as a person. They’re also simply coping as best as they can, and perhaps complaining why the turnaround time for a laptop service is in the weeks - seemingly forgetting what sort of time we are living in - is just symptomatic of the current circumstances. There’s no need for me to retaliate or increase the snark; it wouldn’t be productive, and I’d be the one suffering the stress.

Try not to be unreasonable during these times, but also don’t be upset at others being unreasonable; what we are living through right now is era-defining and unprecedented. Please be kind.

Onwards and upwards.